After a month's time, I decided to come back to my blog. I am going to share you some other experiences. When he went along with his new life, I went to a retreat centre for mental peace and to gain forgiveness. 1 week prayer meetings and counsellings. (As I said I was almost in a state of psychic or mental depression). For the first few days I didn’t feel any change in myself, again same thoughts, same sleepless nights and criying eyes. The lady, the warden of the ladies hostel in the retreat centre, helped me a lot to overcome my situation with hopes and advices.
Time passed,I met there a lot of people; mentally retarded, handicapped and with hell lot of problems. Around 500 AIDS patients, orphans, widows with no family support and old age people. I had no idea that the girl who was sitting near to me for the whole week, (she was very nice to me) was suffering from mental crisis. When I heard the touching story of each person, I thought, “What the f**king problem is mine??? Why am getting depressed for a lost love?” Just so dazed, this recognition, this awareness. I never felt so before.
“I asked God for strength that I might achieve. I was made weak that I might learn humbly to obey. I asked for health that I might do greater things. I was given infirmity that I might do better things. I asked for power that I might have the praise of men. I was given weakness that I might feel the need of God. I asked for all things that I might enjoy life. I was given life that I might enjoy all things. I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I hoped for. Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered. I am, among all men, most richly blessed.”
After the one week meet,I went back to hostel and then to work.I realized that I dont feel much difference in my mental dilemma. But let it be! Challenges are way of life!
“I asked God for strength that I might achieve. I was made weak that I might learn humbly to obey. I asked for health that I might do greater things. I was given infirmity that I might do better things. I asked for power that I might have the praise of men. I was given weakness that I might feel the need of God. I asked for all things that I might enjoy life. I was given life that I might enjoy all things. I got nothing that I asked for, but everything I hoped for. Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered. I am, among all men, most richly blessed.”
After the one week meet,I went back to hostel and then to work.I realized that I dont feel much difference in my mental dilemma. But let it be! Challenges are way of life!
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